Darkness of night

Now let the day just slip away so that the dark night may watch over you
Velvet blue, silent true
It embraces your heart and your soul


Never cry never sigh you don’t have to wonder why
Always be, always see
Come and dream the night with me


Have no fear when the night draws near
And fills you with dreams and desire
Like a child asleep
So warm so deep
You will find me there waiting for you


We will fly, claim the sky
You don’t have to wonder why
Always be always see
Come and dream the night with me


Though darkness lay, it will give way
When the dark night delivers the day

Attitude

Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think, say or do. It is more important than appearance, gift, or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day...I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.

... Charles Swindoll

An Excerpt from "A Five-Star Life" ...

A friend of mine, who has a far greener thumb than I, recently took me on a tour of her backyard in the desert Southwest. She pointed out all the varieties of trees, shrubs and grasses she has planted, but one plant in particular caught my attention. She pointed to a shrub with small dark red blossoms on it, and told me that if you give the plant too much water it doesn't bloom. It thrives and blossoms under just the right amount of environmental stress.
It reminded me of another story of a butterfly, perched on a windowsill, struggling to escape its cocoon. A helpful observer, watching its struggle, decided to gently cut the creature's cocoon open and free it. When the wet butterfly finally emerged, it was unable to fly because what was intended to be helpful had actually prevented the butterfly from strengthening its wings to prepare it for flight.
Perhaps the stress we experience can be the predictor of beautiful flowers or elegant flight in our own lives. Perhaps if we are patient and stop to be grateful for our experiences, we too, like the plant or the butterfly, will blossom or fly in unexpected ways as a result of the stress, rather than being defeated by it.
I'm not saying that stress is always a good thing. I am saying, from first-hand experience, that's it's not always a bad thing either. We need the right amount of tension to keep us "blossoming." And while we humans are more complex than a plant, we can learn valuable lessons by observing nature.
If you're in a period when stress seems to be your constant companion, take a lesson from nature.
Instead of asking, "Why am I having to deal with all of this?" ask yourself what you most need to learn from your experiences. View the situation much like the butterfly must see its cocoon...as a barrier you must break through to become the extraordinary creature you were designed to be.
It's not always easy to maintain such a perspective. We often make our experiences harder than they have to be by our resistance to change, growth or stress. Stay focused and use stress to take you a step closer to the flower or butterfly you want to become.
"It is a basic principle of spiritual life that we learn the deepest things in unknown territory. Often it's when we feel most confused inwardly and are in the midst of our greatest difficulties that something new will open. We awaken most easily to the mystery of life through our weakest side. The areas of our greatest strength, where we are the most competent and clearest, tend to keep us away from the mystery."

-Jack Kornfield

It all makes sense to me ...

In life there are no mistakes, only lessons ...

"Do not dwell upon the sins and mistakes of yesterday so exclusively as to have no energy and mind left for living rightly today, and do not think that the sins of yesterday can prevent you from living purely today." - As A Man Thinketh

It's been said that the majority of conversations by men over 40 are about the past. Sometimes it´s about the "good old days" and sometimes it's about the deals gone bad, the "if I only had" stories, the missed opportunities, etc.

Letting our "sins and mistakes of yesterday" dominate our thinking today robs us of our present joy and our future happiness. It causes us to miss the real opportunity of TODAY!

John Maxwell, in his outstanding best-seller, Failing Forward, gives some great practical advice: "To move forward today, you must learn to say goodbye to yesterday's hurts, tragedies and baggage. You can't build a monument to past problems and fail forward."

Take time right now to list the negative events from your past that may still be holding you hostage. For each item you list, go through the following exercise:

1. Acknowledge the pain.
2. Grieve the loss.
3. Forgive the person.
4. Forgive yourself.
5. Determine to release the event and move on.

Your best days are definitely ahead of you if you treat your "mistakes" as necessary lessons to be learned. If you understand that each lesson brings with it a certain amount of wisdom, you can understand how truly enhanced your life is becoming. Many people can't achieve the success of their dreams because they won't leave their past behind. They won't tear down the monuments they've built to their old hurts and problems.

One of the best teachings I've ever heard on this was from a motivational speaker whose name has escaped me, but whose message didn't: "In life there are no mistakes, only lessons."

Dreams

Dreams are renewable. No matter what our age or condition, there are still untapped possibilities within us and new beauty waiting to be born.
.. Dale E. Turner

So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.
.. Morrie Schwartz

Change ...

Life is about change
Acknowledging change
Embracing change

No matter how painful the process
No matter the consequence it brings
Change we must accept
By change we learn to adapt
Change is inevitable

Like it or not
Letting go
Moving on
Life goes on
It evolves

For better or worse
Till death
Change will forever depart us

Wrote this poem some years back ...

Someone once said ... life is pleasant, death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome ...

Therefore, it's been destined that one's life will be fraught with wants and needs unfulfilled as human nature is never satisfied.

Attitude ...

A great attitude does much more than turn on the lights in our worlds; it seems to magically connect us to all sorts of serendipitous opportunities that were somehow absent before we changed.
.. Earl Nightingale

Loving is being

All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.

.. Helen Keller

True generosity ...

Real generosity is doing something nice for someone who will never find out.

Forgiveness ...

The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
.. Gandhi

The gift of understanding ...

When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce.

Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and arguments.

That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding.

..Thich Nhat Hahn

The light of life

Go out into the world today and love the people you meet. Let your presence light new light in the hearts of people.
.. Mother Teresa

Peace

If there is to be any peace it will come through being, not having.
.. Henry Miller

In giving, you receive ...

What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us. What we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.
.. Albert Pine

The law on love

Hatred does not cease by hatred at any time; hatred ceases by love. This is an unalterable law.

.. Buddha

Living with a purpose ...

It's not enough to have lived. We should be determined to live for something. May I suggest that it be creating joy for others, sharing what we have for the betterment of personkind, bringing hope to the lost and love to the lonely.
.. Leo Buscaglia

Cherish ...

Cherish your vision; Cherish your ideals; Cherish the music that stirs in your heart, the beauty that forms in your mind, the loveliness that drapes your purest thoughts. If you remain true to them, your world will at last be built.

.. James Allen

Fear

Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive -- the risk to be alive and express what we really are.

.. Don Miguel Ruiz

Loneliness

Loneliness is not the same as being alone. Everyone has times when he or she is alone through circumstances or choice. Being alone can be experienced as positive, pleasurable, and emotionally refreshing if it is under the individual's control. Solitude is the state of being alone and secluded from other people, and often implies having made a conscious choice to be alone. Loneliness is therefore unwilling solitude.

In their growth as individuals, humans start a separation process at birth, which continues with growing independence towards adulthood. As such, feeling alone can be a healthy emotion and, indeed, choosing to be alone for a period of solitude can be enriching. To experience loneliness, however, can be to feel overwhelmed by an unbearable feeling of separateness at a profound level. This can manifest in feelings of abandonment, rejection, depression, insecurity, anxiety, hopelessness, unworthiness, meaninglessness, and resentment. If these feelings are prolonged they may become debilitating and prevent the affected individual from developing healthy relationships and lifestyles. If the individual is convinced he or she is unlovable, this will increase the experience of suffering and the likelihood of avoiding social contact. Low self esteem will often trigger the social disconnection which can lead to loneliness.

Sorry: feeling sorrow, regret, or penitence

Why do people say sorry but not make an effort to show that they are truly feeling sorry for the things they did or for something they should have done but did not do. After the sorry is said,life goes on as usual - no change or rather, no improvement.

Action surely does speak louder than words. To show sincerity, one must make a conscious effort to express regret and penitence, failing which 'sorry' does not mean anything.

Woman

She can kill with a smile
She can wound with her eyes
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies
And she only reveals what she wants you to see
She hides like a child

She can lead you to love
She can take you or leave you
She can ask for the truth
But she'll never believe you
And shall take what you give her, as long as she loves you
She steals like a thief

She takes care of herself
She can wait if she wants
She's ahead of her time
And she never gives up
And she never gives in
She just changes her mind

And she'll promise you more
Than the garden of eden
Then she'll carelessly cut you
And laugh while you're bleeding
But she'll bring out the best
And the worst you can be
Blame it all on yourself

She is frequently kind
And can be suddenly cruel
She can do as she pleases
She's nobody's fool
But she can't be convicted
She's earned her degree
And the most she will do
Is throw shadows at you

But she'll always remain the woman in your life

Honesty

If you search for tenderness
it isn't hard to find.
You can have the love you need to live.
But if you look for truthfulness
You might just as well be blind.
It always seems to be so hard to give.

Honesty is such a lonely word.
Everyone is so untrue.
Honesty is hardly ever heard.
And mostly what I need from you.

I can always find someone
to say they sympathize.
If I wear my heart out on my sleeve.
But I don't want some pretty face
to tell me pretty lies.
All I want is someone to believe.

I can find a lover.
I can find a friend.
I can have security until the bitter end.
Anyone can comfort me
with promises again.
I know, I know.

When I'm deep inside of me
don't be too concerned.
I won't ask for nothin' while I'm gone.
But when I want sincerity
tell me where else can I turn.
Because you're the one I depend upon.

If a picture paints a thousand words ...

If a picture paints a thousand words,
Then why can´t I paint you?
The words will never show
The you I´ve come to know
If a face could launch a thousand ships,
Then where am I to go?
There´s no one home but you,
You´re all that´s left me too
And when my love for life is running dry,
You come and pour yourself on me
If I could be two places at one time,
I´d be with you
Tomorrow and today,
Beside you all the way
If the world should stop revolving
Spinning slowly down to die,
I´d spend the end with you
And when the world was through,
Then one by one the stars would all go out,
Then you and I would simply fly away

.. David Gates

One body, many parts

For me, the different religions are like beautiful flowers from the same garden, or they are branches of the same majestic tree. Therefore, they are equally true though being received and interpreted through human instruments equally imperfect.

... Mahatma Gandi

The web of life ...

Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.

a sense of loss ...

If you were walking back from a well, carrying a bucket of water & someone jostled you, there could be spilled from the bucket only that which it contained. As you walk along the way of life, people are constantly bumping into you. If your heart is full of ill nature, bad temper, and ugly disposition, only those things will be spilled from it. On the other hand, if it is full of love, you will spill a smile or pleasant remark. You can spill from your bucket only that which it contains. ~Author Unknown

Lately, I am like a bucket filled with much discontentment, unhappiness, anger. Unfortunately, only those dear and near to me will feel the impact of these spilled contents when they bumped into me.

What is happening to me? I seem to be losing the zest for life.

It seems everything is deliberately going against me ... the good is drifting away from me and the bad is closing in.

I know I sound very negative ... and it's not healthy especially when I need to be a walking and living example of strength, perseverance, courage and hope to my precious ones.

I pray for these negative vibes to go away ...

The strongest oak

The strongest oak of the forest is not the one that is protected from the storm and hidden from the sun. It's the one that stands in the open where it is compelled to struggle for its existence against the winds and rains and the scorching sun.

Quoting Napoleon Hill, I somehow can relate to what he said.

All things happen for a reason ... our existence, our failures, our pains and sufferings, our success. Sometimes you wonder, "why am I here?" We may never know the true reason. You wonder, "why am I planted into this family?" There is a purpose for you to be where you are, to be who you are and to be what you are.

By suffering, we learn to be compassionate. By our failures, we learn to be humble. By being successful, we are to share with others what we have ... we have to learn to be unselfish and generous in giving of our ourselves, of our time and share generously with those less privileged.

an eye-opening week

Last week took me through another journey of learning. We had a 4-day professional tournament at Laguna National Golf & Country Club. The week started with registration of the golf pros from ASEAN member countries on Mon, Nov 5 and culminated with the finals on Sat, Nov 10. It's my first time getting involved in a professional event. Some of these pros behaved pompously due to their pro status, others were humble. Human beings are an interesting lot of creatures. Nevertheless, it was kinda fun rubbing shoulders with these guys ... even though they don't bear big names like Tiger Woods.

Made a few acquaintances, observed a couple of unpleasant occurences, learnt a little bit more about golf - the game, the rules, the scorings and how things were done behind the scene. I have been encouraged to take up golf many times ... and after spending a week at the club and buggying through the course to watch the pros, I suddenly had a fleeting urge to pick up the game. Haha .. just a fleeting thought ...

Sweet lilies for granny :)

Flowers never fail to put a smile on my face. It somehow has a therapeutic effect on me. Whenever I pass by a florist, I would involuntarily stop to gaze at the beautiful array of colours, shapes and forms of these creations. Simply awesome!

The above arrangement was created by me at the request of my daughter, who wanted to present that to a friend's grandma on her birthday. Hope you liked it, Grandma!

Learning to relax ...

Just realised I've been rushing around too much lately without stopping to appreciate the beautiful wonders that God has created for the human race. It's been a rather full week for me ... or rather, a week full of worries. Now looking back at the week that passed, it didn't seem so frightening after all. I made it through!

We tend to worry unnecessary ... worrying about events that we are expecting to occur but somehow did not. Even if they did, I would still have to come face to face with them and with the dawning of a new day, yesterday would not matter that much any more. Whatever has to happen, had happened. Life must continue its journey through me. We are all different but yet the same. We are on this earth just temporarily, living out the roles given to us. How we want to live it is up to us really. To live meaningfully and leaving a legacy for your descendants to remember fondly of you ... or otherwise.

Tomorrow will be another new day ... with new challenges ahead. Honestly, nobody knows what's going to happen to each one of us tomorrow or even the next minute, hour. Every moment is being held on His palm.

Instructions for Life by The Dalai Lama

Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
Follow the three R’s:
- Respect for self,
- Respect for others and
- Responsibility for all your actions.
Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
Don’t let a little dispute injure a great relationship.
When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
Spend some time alone every day.
Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and
think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
Share your knowledge. It is a way to achieve immortality.
Be gentle with the earth.
Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.
If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

It's in giving that you receive

You can have everything you want in life if you will help enough people to get what they want. As life is to live, love is to give ...

The forward train ...

To move forward today, you must learn to say goodbye to yesterday's hurts, tragedies and baggage.

Take time right now to list the negative events from your past that may still be holding you hostage. For each item you list, go through the following exercise:

Acknowledge the pain
Grieve the loss
Forgive the person
Forgive yourself
Determine to release the event and
Move on

In life, there are no mistakes, only lessons to be learnt.

Is SUCCESS everything?

Someone once said to me that success isn't everything and I know what they really meant was Money wasn't everything. Well, money indeed isn't everything but Success, I believe, IS everything!

Why?

Well ... first you need to succeed to survive. We must take the seasons and learn how to use them. With the seed, the soil and the rain of opportunity to learn how to sustain ourselves and family.

And, secondly, is to then succeed to flourish in every part of your life.

Ask a mature person "if you could do better, should you?" I believe everybody would then answer in the positive. If you could earn more and share more, shouldn't you do that? If you can learn more, shouldn't you do that? If you can improve your relationships and spirituality, shouldn't you do that?

And that is what success is really all about. It is not just a destination that is set for everybody to try and go for. It is more like improving in every area of your life to see if you can't with satisfaction at the end of the day, week, month or year, say "hmmm,I've made excellent progress this year, for myself and for my family, my business, career and health.

That kind of success, I believe, everybody recognises as legitimate and something we should all strive for.

There is an interesting phrase in the bible that says "strive for perfection". Not that we can ever reach it, but it is in the striving to be a little better today than yesterday, in our speech, language, our health and everything you can possibly think of, that we achieve something good.

Hence, in my opinion ... success is everything and I want to do everything I can to improve my life - my spirituality, my relationships, my health, my career and live a more purposeful life.

liFe iS shoRt ...

I have learnt ...

No problem lasts forever ... no matter how permanently fixed in the centre of our lives it may seem.

Whatever we experience in this ever-changing life is sure to pass. Even pain.

Difficult situations often bring out qualities in us that otherwise might not have risen to the surface, such as courage, faith and our need for one another. All of our experiences can help us grow.

But we need patience. Some wounds cannot be healed quickly. They must be given time.

In the meantime, we can appreciate the new capabilities we are developing such as the capability to mourn and the willingness to accept.

I have learnt.

There is no special way

Looking around, you wonder why
we can live a life that's never satisfied
Lonely hearts, troubled minds
looking for a way that we can never find
Many roads are ahead of us
with choices to be made
But life's just one of the games we play

Future dreams can never last
when you find yourself still living in the past
Keep moving on to higher ground
looking for the way you thought could not be found
We may not know the reason
why we're born into this world
where a man only lives to die
and his story left untold

So, make the best of what's given you
and everything will come in time
Why deny yourself?
Don't let life just pass you by

This is one of my favourite pieces from Sarah Brightman's collection ...

The future comes one day at a time ...

At the centre of the universe is a loving heart that continues to beat and wants the best for every person. Anything that we can do to help foster the intellect, spirit and emotional growth of our fellow human beings, shall be our job. Those of us who have this particular vision must continue against all odds.

Life is for service.

.. Fred Rogers

Living a new life ...

Nobody knows how long they would ever live. But one thing we do know is that we have to live responsibly for ourselves and for those around us, especially our family and loved ones.

We have to realise it's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it.

Reflections ...

If you train your mind to search for the positive things about other people, you will be surprised at how many good things you can observe in them and comment upon ~ Maya Angelou

Like taking a shower, make the planting of positive thoughts a daily practice ~ Neil Eskelin